My pregnancy had no indication of anything being different. It had been a typical pregnancy for me.
After Joshua was born. When he was placed in my arms, I knew right away before anyone said anything. I said,” God gave me a special one!”
The news was confirmed by the head NICU doctor paying us a visit in our room. I was holding Josh and he gave me all the worst case scenarios of what Down Syndrome entailed. He asked for questions, of which I had 1,000 but didn’t feel like asking him. He left the room leaving me feeling completely overwhelmed.
I was surprised when I saw Josh. I knew the statistics for my age as a 44 year old. But never thought it could happen to me. I was scared because I had no information on Down Syndrome and what it means. And I was sad, at first, that my baby had to endure this.
I only knew what Down syndrome looked like and didn’t know what goes on inside that would affect my son. Parenting & raising a child all of a sudden became unfamiliar to me even though this was my 10th.
Before my son was born, I knew two children of friends who had Down Syndrome, but I never felt comfortable talking about it with them…until after Josh was born and then I asked them my 1,000 questions. Which they graciously answered. They reassured me it’s all going to be more than ok. In fact, they said it will be a wonderful experience. And they were right.
We have supportive friends & family and I never felt awkward or uncomfortable telling anyone. I probably shared too much… I told everyone who saw him – stores- post office- coffee shop- “You know, he has Down syndrome!”
My biggest obstacle with the diagnosis was Unfamiliarity – the unknown. My pediatrician said it’s ok to cry, it doesn’t make you love him any less. And when he left I did. I cried out all my fears and worries to the Lord.
Josh has been blessed to have no other health issues. He nursed really well. And besides being a little “floppy” at first, he progressed like all my other children.
When my body decided to go into labor- I had the flu – bad! My midwife suggested we go to the hospital to get fluids. Once there I had progressed to 9 and we needed to stay. His birth was no different than my others. Intense & beautiful at the same time.
My husband was quiet at first. He knew before me because he saw Joshua’s face before I did. He cried when he told the other kids. But he accepted & loved him from the very second he set eyes upon him.
The diagnosis has not affected our relationship. It did give us all another shared bond of being on the same team pulling in the same direction to achieve the best, most positive, experience for all of us.
In regards to my feelings in the beginning, honestly, I would cry often whenever I looked at Josh. I felt so bad for him. Now, I do still see the syndrome every time I see him, but it’s just another part of him to love. I see it from a different perspective. It doesn’t bother me anymore. He’s such a happy boy! Of course, if I could change the chromosomes I would! I’d want that for him. But, at the same time I do love him just as he is. My prayer is that he would understand who Jesus is and live for Him. This life is so temporary. In heaven, he’ll be whole again. And that’s forever.
My best advice for another mom walking this path:
1) Any apprehensions you have now, will vanish over time. How you feel in 3 mos, 6 mos, 12 mos will be different. Once you get to know your little one everything changes.
2) Take one day at a time. Don’t think about your little one’s life as an adult. Situations are relative and change. Your feelings and future opportunities both have optimistic and amazing outlooks.
3) Please know you’ll have a whole community of people to share with, get support from and gather great resources from.
4) Realize you are going to be part of a wonderful amazing adventure you wouldn’t want to miss!! And you’d totally regret it if you let this pass you by!:)
Wendy helps to run several family businesses. Wendy and her family live near Yosemite National Park, CA with their 9 children. (Their oldest 
recently married and lives nearby).Wendy’s husband has encouraged all the family members to be producers, not just consumers. All of their projects focus on helping others with the skills they have.Wendy has recently added on a project to help new Moms with a DS diagnosis. The brochure she created can be found at ReachingDown.com. The family also has a family band that tours: ShawFamilyBand.com
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