I Thought I Knew What Down Syndrome Looked Like

I Knew What Down Syndrome Looked Like…

When we learned of my son’s diagnosis of Down Syndrome I had a mental image of what Down Syndrome looked like. Each individual that I had ever seen who had Down Syndrome had similar characteristics, the eyes, the forehead, the shorter stature. It isn’t hard to someone out of a crowd who has Down Syndrome. The hair color may be different, the cultural background may be different, but the similar facial features are always present.

That is where I got stuck, when I learned that my son had Down Syndrome I got stuck for a bit seeing just those characteristics and that is what permeated my whole vision. I think that the shock of a birth diagnosis can affect a person, even a loving parent, for a brief time where their mind is truly trying to comprehend all the new information that it is being fed. The thing is, I thought I knew what Down Syndrome was because it is something that you can see on the outside. I was so very misinformed. What I now see when I look at someone with the physical characteristics of Down Syndrome is vastly different.

Now it is the invisible that comes into focus.

I see tenacity

It isn’t easy to have to work harder than everyone else just to be able to master those first gross motor skills. It is a challenge to have to be put through exercises daily to be able to strengthen your muscle tone to be able to do the things that come effortlessly to others. It is hard to make your mouth form intricate sounds and utterances.

I see wonder

In a way that is lost when a person grows up and becomes more cynical, but so far, that is not something that seems to be present in individuals I have connected with. Cynicism is not there because, there is optimism, and wonder about the world around us.

I see possibilities

When society doesn’t box in what a person is capable of, simply because of their diagnosis, the possibilities are vast. It is possible that individuals with Down Syndrome can live independently, marry, hold jobs, go to college, become entrepreneurs, and surprise you. The possibilities really are infinite.

I see contentment

I am learning that a person can be quite content with who they are and be quite confident and comfortable in their own skin. Many of the individuals I am now meeting have a lot to teach the rest of the world about being comfortable being who they are and not apologizing for it. I see a level of content that surpasses the extra 10 pounds a person carries, the color of hair they were born with, and even the height that they grow to.

I see compassion

I am a compassionate person, but I am seeing, even in my own very young son, a keen ability to pick up on the emotions of others and be in tune emotionally to a degree that I have not seen in the general population. There is a level of emotional sensitivity that most people are not capable of.

I see beauty

In the characteristics that I initially was taken aback by, I see beauty. It is there in my son’s eyes that disappear into beautiful crescent moons when a smile overtakes his entire face. It is there in the perfectly adorable, chubby short fingers. It is there in the confidence exuded by young adults. Down syndrome is beautiful.

While I thought I knew what Down Syndrome looked like, in the beginning, there was actually quite a bit that I was not seeing. I now know that it is the characteristics that are not present physically that are often overlooked and truly the most important.